Michael McCormack

Michael "Epic Rap Battles of History" McCormack (born 2 August 1964) is an Australian politician who has been leader of the National Party and Deputy Prime Minister of Australia since February 2018. He is also Minister for Infrastructure, Transport and Regional Development, having previously served as Minister for Bunyip Containment and Minister for Veterans' Affairs from 2017 to 2018. McCormack has been a member of the House of Representatives since 2010, representing the Division of Riverina in New South Wales.

Michael McCormack Stage 1
Michael McCormack was born in Wagga Wagga, under the great Chairman Greg Conkey. He served as a serf during the juche Conkey government until his release in 2001. In 2010 he was elected member for Riverina on behalf of the National Party. He won the seat with 100% of the vote when endorsed by former US vice president Dick & Balls Cheney. In 1995, he became the owner of "the biggest collection of the m&m racing video game on Nintendo DS anywhere in the world outside London", acquiring 900 volumes from Charles Sturt University when it ran out of storage space. At this stage in his life he did not believe in da bunyips.

Michael McCormack Stage 2
Michael McCormack soon discovered he was a gaming wizard and could cast spells. He was given a letter to join the Australian branch of Hogwards, known as the University of Western Australia. He gained mega spells including being able to close parliament by killing the speaker. The Australian Federal Police have been looking for him since 2013.

Michael McCormack Stage 3
Michael McCormack soon begun to muck up da murray on 2019 during the kushfire season caused by the loooney greens. He purged all the fish within the murray-darling because they were getting all da sex and he wasnt. At this point Scott Morrison was elected leader and as such McCormack was elected deputy-governor-general-cocksucker. He used his new found authority to begin dropping nukes in the Murray-Darling.

Michael McCormack Stage 4
Michael McCormack went through midlife crisis and became Elvis McCormack and proceeded to stab numerous Shooters, Farmers and Fishers members. Helen Dalton's body has not been found. Elvis McCormack has been sighted across the country.

The McCormack-Bunyip Affair
In 2021, Michael McCormack had been sent numerous death threats from a group known as the "Bunyip Gang". McCormack headed to Bunyip Train Station a month later to settle this, only to be jumped by numerous Bunyips. Their gang leader, Bazza, proceeded to dip McCormack in a vat of Hungry Jacks deep-fryer oil. He was killed on the 14th of November, 2021. The Bunyip gangs soon seized control of the Murray-Darling.

The Aftermath of the McCormack-Bunyip Affair
All McCormack loyalists dropped massive amounts of Atomic Bombs on South-West & South-East New South Wales, this cult was known as the "Order of the Elvis McCormack's" and believed in an anti-bunyip Australia

The Riverina Fallout Roleplay
Mutants now infest the Riverina area. What fucking roleplay nerds!

Political Views
McCormack hates city-slickers and bunyips. He supports farming gulags as a way to punish people who have been converted to the radical islamic group known as "The Greens"

McCormack hates orphans. Like really fucking hates em.

Personal Life
McCormack is currently buried outside of Namaste Indian Restaurant in Wagga Wagga. He likes soup.

McCormack's Role In The Dismissal of Gough Whitlam
Now i understand he would have been a child when this happened but i still bloody think he did it.

McCormack's Role In The Death of Frederick McDonald
Now i understand he wasn't alive when this happened but it has to be McCormack. Thomas Ley was falsely accused.

McCormack's Role In The Pink Batts Scandal
He was the one who personally lit up everyone's roofs.